nanovivid

A recent conversation with Jeremiah made me do some reflecting on my thought processes and methods of interacting with others. I recognized with new clarity some aspects of my personality. One distinction was how much I tend to live my life intuitively, as opposed to following logic or rational thought. Not to say that I’m irrational, but I recognized that I more often follow my gut feelings than I take time to think through all aspects of a decision or issue. I have yet to determine if this is something I want to change. Right now it’s at the "oh, that’s interesting" stage.

Another realization was that one of the reasons I avoid making definite stands on many issues or having strong opinions is a desire to be liked and to fit in. What I feel deep down (whether it’s completely valid or not I don’t know) is that having opinions makes other people not like you. It really bothers me when someone is mad it me or doesn’t like me for whatever reason.

I haven’t had any great eurekas concerning what, if anything, to do about what I have observed. However, I feel that by recognizing these things, I have accomplished something. Or other.

This entry about my personality quirks is particularly appropriate given the Personality Disorder Test that has been circulating around LiveJournal recently. (For the record, I got moderate ratings on schizotypal and histronic behavior and low on everything else… maybe I’m not so much of a freak as I thought I was ;-).

♫ The Album Leaf - Hang Over